I made the decision in 2018 to keep my head shaved for a year. My first shave was by a professional stylist, but then I bought a set a clippers and re-shaved it ever 7-10 days. It was great in the warmer months. Not having hair kept me much cooler. Starting in the summer of 2019, in addition to cutting my hair with clippers, I began using a razor blade to cut my hair as close as possible, making my head feel as smooth as a honeydew melon.

Having no hair was super convenient. Every morning, all I had to do was flop out of bed, and I was ready to go. I never had to deal with bed head, and I didn’t have to pay for conditioner, styling products, or haircuts for a year. (I washed my head stubble with a shampoo bar a few times a week.)

I’ll admit, having no hair made me feel like a badass at time, like the embodiment of a superhero. I don’t think it made me more aerodynamic though.

Painted Gold from Head to Toe

One of the best experiences I had while bald was being painted by Skin City in Las Vegas. Since I didn’t have hair, the artist was able to paint me, literally, from the top of my head to the top of my feet (except for a pair of pasties and gold undies. I felt like a living statue.

After the event, I put my jeans and went back to my hotel. My friends liked watching people react to me watching around with my gold head and torso, so I humored them by walking through the casino floor. That’s where we learned the fun way that you can’t walk through a casino with a painted face (which is ironic given how much makeup some people wear). Security stopped us as I was finishing my lap around the room.

Assumptions People Made About Me

There were a few occasions when people asked if I had cancer. One man came up to me in the parking lot of Sprouts and tried to tell me about how carrot juice kills cancer. Every time, I responded honestly that I was just taking a break from having hair.

As far as I know, no one assumed that I was a Neo Nazi, or anything, though a friend said I looked a bit scary in a tank top with my no-hair.

Did I Ever Sunburn my Head?

I am grateful to whoever invented spray on sunblock. I rarely left the house without spraying my head if it was after sunrise. I managed to go the whole year without burning my scalp. When I went outside for longer workouts, I wore a bandana under my helmet when I was biking and a hat when I was running to protect my head from the sun.

Lessons Learned

Here are some of the things I learned from my year with no hair:

• It’s challenging to cut your own hair around and behind your ears.
• Yes, you can cut yourself with clippers. I nicked the top of my earlobe on numerous occasions.
• It’s really easy to cut yourself if you use a disposable razor to shave your head.
• It’s difficult to find a ballgown that goes with no-hair. The fanciness of the dress didn’t have anything to balance it out up top. I tried to find a sparkly headband, but it didn’t look right.
• It was easier to present myself androgynously without hair. More people addressed me as “sir,” when I was in baggy guy clothes.

Now What?

Now I’m letting my hair grow out, going back to my previous undercut. I’ve started to miss it. Hopefully, I’ll have enough hair to have the style I want by this summer.