Day 86 of theÂ 90 Days of AwesomeÂ is in the bank! What made today awesome?Â I got to help a friend celebrate their sobriety anniversary.
The people I’ve met are incredible, and they come from all walks of life. I really appreciate it when I meet people like me â€“ people in their 30s with 10+ years of sobriety. We’re in similar phases of life professionally and in terms of our recovery. I can relate to most people in regards to their program, but it’s special to have friends with who I share so many other similarities as well.
One of those friends celebrated a sobriety â€œbirthdayâ€ today. She’s biologically younger than me, but in regards to the program, she’s â€œolderâ€ than me. I love it.
Day 67 of theÂ 90 Days of AwesomeÂ is in the bank! What made today awesome?Â I celebrated 11 years of sobriety!
Holy fucking shit â€“ how did that happen? In so many ways I feel like someone who is fairly new to the program, sitting in one of the â€œparanoid seatsâ€ at the clubhouse with my back to the wall. But when I think about it, I’ve come a long way from that scared, desperate, lost, nearly suicidal person I was 11 years ago.
So many things have happened since then – amazing joys and terrible sorrows â€“ and I throughout all of it, I haven’t had to take a drink or a drug to manage my feelings.
I am so grateful for my Recovery Family who have trudged the road with me. This is absolutely a program of one addict helping another. I am especially grateful for my sponsor. I’ve been with him for over 6 years. He is the person I count on to tell me when things are fucked up and when I am seeing things as they are.
When I asked him to sponsor me, he told me one of the expectations was that I would call or email every day. I couldn’t believe it. How could he asked that of me? I was nearly 5 years sober. I didn’t need to check in every day. However, it’s over 6 years later and I still call or email just about every day, and I look forward to telling him about my day and how I’m feeling.
Something about this sobriety anniversary feels particularly special and surreal, maybe because so much has happened in the last year â€“ new home, new job, and big personal developments. I find myself spinning my chip between my fingers with a big grin on my face.
I feel like I’ve come a long way, and I know there is much work to be done in the future. I’m looking forward to it.
Today’s sponsor is my dear friend who is celebrating 22 years of sobriety this week. Â He asked me to write about recovery from addiction.Â I’ve had the privilege of knowing a handful of incredible people who are recovering from addictions to various substances.Â It is amazing to hear their stories about how their lives used to be and to see them now as functional and successful people.Â Most of my friends who have done this needed help from a recovery program like Alcoholics Anonymous.
The transformation that people in recovery can experience is incredible.Â One of my friends used to be a prostitute when she was using, and now she’s a nanny for a family with a special needs child.Â Another one of my friends used to be a misanthropic drug dealer who sold drugs to college kids to support his habit, and now he’s close to finishing his college degree and has aspirations of going to graduate school.Â He’s also one of the most thoughtful and gentle people I’ve ever met.
A few years ago, I invited one of my friends who is in recovery to dinner with my parents.Â He is one of the kindest and warm-hearted people you will ever meet and he does not hide the fact that he’s in recovery.Â Afterwards, as Mom and I were washing the dishes, she turned to me and asked, â€œDid he used to be really messed up?â€Â She couldn’t believe that this wonderful intelligent person that I’m proud to call my friend used to be drunk and/or high on a daily basis.
These are only a handful of the stories of recovery.Â Dozens of AA Speaker Tapes of people’s stories of recovery are available for free on iTunes.Â These are people who were so full of pain and shame, who had no self-esteem, and were so uncomfortable in their skin that they had a compulsion to medicate their feelings with drugs and alcohol, regardless of the consequences.Â It’s amazing that the found the help they needed and stuck with the program to get sober.
And it’s hard work.Â I’ve heard that programs like Alcoholics Anonymous are simple, but not easy.Â They require a willingness to be uncomfortable and to learn to live in a new way where people don’t have the option of self-medicating to escape their discomfort.Â It requires being willing to walk through fear and not self-sabotage their potential for success.Â The work is worth it, because recovery comes with hope, freedom, and the ability to dream again.
Tonight, I asked my friend who, if all goes according to plan, will be celebrating 22 years of sobriety this week what advice he would give to someone who is contemplating recovery or who is new to the program.Â He said, â€œYou’re worth it.Â You’re worth giving it a try.Â You have nothing else to lose.Â Give yourself permission not to self-sabotage.â€
Sponsor A Law Kid is my endeavor to pay for my last semester of law school. Today’s sponsor is Anonymous.Â For more information about Sponsor A Law Kid or to see what days are still available for sponsorship, visit my Sponsor A Law Kid page.