The

Undeniable

Ruth

®

…and the Ruth shall set you free!

  • Undeniable Recap of 2025

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    Ruth Carter

    I’m not going to lie – 2025 was kind of a brutal year – on this planet, in my country, in my life, and in my head. But everything didn’t suck. I’m glad I keep a running Word document as well as a happy memories jar throughout the year so I can look back and see the good things that happened. Likewise, I’m glad I have this blog where I can share some of them with you.

    Below are my top events from the year, lessons I learned (or re-learned), and things I experienced for the first time. What may not be obvious, especially since I’m an anxious introvert, is how much I value the people in my life. Without further ado, here are the top five events from my life in 2025:

    The Trump Transitions Documentary

    A documentary team was inspired to create a film that examined the impact of Felon 47’s executive orders that limited gender options to only male and female, restricted access to hormone replacement therapy, and eliminated the option of changing your gender on your U.S. passport. They asked me to be part of it after they saw my testimony before the Arizona House of Representatives’ Government Committee against HB2062, which would have limited gender options in Arizona to only male and female.

    Each of us who testified were allotted only a few minutes to speak, and I was blown away when Republican Representative Blackman told me to continue even after the time limit passed.

    The resulting documentary, The Trump Transitions, shines a light on what it’s like to be transgender in the USA during this administration. Their interview with me focused on passports and how it feels to face discrimination on an institutional level. I currently have a non-binary passport, but unless the rules change, when it’s up for renewal in 2032, the State Department will only issue a passport with the gender I was assigned at birth. Likewise, even though I should be able to travel internationally, I don’t feel like I can leave the country because I’m afraid the administration will change the rules while I’m away and I’ll have trouble getting back into the USA.

    Other transgender people who were interviewed for the documentary discussed their experiences with things like losing access to gender-affirming health care and facing discrimination in the workplace. I’m grateful that this film exists because it shows people who don’t have a transgender person in their life some of the challenges we face on a daily basis.

    Ironman Lake Placid: 15:57:00

    Coach David Roher and I did our third Ironman Lake Placid together in July 2025.

    The forecast predicted a touch of rain for just the first few hours of the race, but the forecast was wrong. Instead, it was dry through the swim, and then it rained for 3 hours during the bike portion of the race. The bike course is two 56-mile loops through Lake Placid and the surrounding cities, including a 9% decline from Placid into Keene. On the first loop, it wasn’t raining and I flew down this hill, reaching speeds up to 36mph, being passed by racers going more than 50mph. By the second loop, it was raining so hard, we couldn’t see the details of the roadway. Even the atheists were praying they wouldn’t hit a rock or a divot that would send them crashing to the ground. I death-gripped my brakes to keep from going too fast.

    Coach David caught up with me towards the end of the second loop, and we had a do-si-do pattern where he’d pass me going up the hills, and I’d pass him going down the hills and on the flat portions. Because of the rain, I couldn’t ride as fast as I would have liked, and so, as a result, I was on the bike longer than I expected and my legs were more tired by the time I finished – and I still had a marathon to run. Run?! Who was I kidding, I could jog at best, and often not even that. I finished Ironman Lake Placid in 15 hours, 57 minutes, the longest race of my life to date. I burst into tears when I crossed that finish line from joy and exhaustion. Coach David got his wife a VIP  pass so she could be there to hug each of us when we crossed the finish line.

    After I crossed the finish line, I was so cold I went to the warming tent to wait for Coach David to finish. My legs were so sore after the race, I needed a medic to help lower me into a chair. As you know, I don’t carry my phone with me during Ironman. When I finally got back to my room, it made me so happy to see all the messages from friends who tracked me from afar.

    It’s our tradition to start the race holding hands.

    Surprising Godfather and the Spawn

    My friend Joe and his son, Adam, came to Phoenix to watch some Cleveland Guardians spring training games. Their itinerary was full, and the Cleveland Guardians spring training facility is on the other side of the valley from where I live, so I knew Joe wouldn’t have time to hang out, but I wanted to at least say hi.

    I enlisted Joe’s wife, Pam, who gave me their flight information and some suggestions about what type of snacks and drinks they might like. After a 4-hour flight, with probably another hour to go to get their rental car and drive to their hotel, I figured they’d be hungry.

    While Joe and Adam were on their flight to Phoenix, I assembled a tote bag of their goodies and stapled a sign to it that said, “Godfather and the Spawn,” like it was the name of a rock band. I felt like I was on a mission. With the tote bag in one hand, and Lucy’s leash in the other, we headed to the airport and positioned ourselves just beyond security.

    Joe’s jaw dropped with surprise and joy when he saw us, and he gave me a big hug. I wasn’t going to let my friend come to town and not see him, if only for a few minutes. I gave them their tote bag of snacks and wished them a good time at spring training.

    Missing accomplished.

    Meet and Greet with Guy Raz

    I was so excited when Content Marketing World announced that the big keynote speaker was Guy Raz, the host of How I Built This. I gleefully sat in the front row and took a lot of notes. After his talk, I was one of the lucky ones who was invited backstage for a brief meet and greet.

    Guy Raz couldn’t have been nicer. I knew I had to keep it brief, so I asked only one question – his advice for me for getting back into writing. I expected him to give a quick 2 sentence answer, but he acted like he had all the time in the world and gave me some thoughtful suggestions. And of course, he gushed over Lucy Jane.

    Karaoke at MPB2B

    I had the pleasure of attending and speaking at MarketingProfs B2B Forum in November 2025. This is a top-notch marketing conference with some of the best speakers in the business, some of whom I’m lucky enough to call my friends. The event also has fantastic morning and evening events to bookend each day – one of which was karaoke.

    As a classically trained soprano, you might be surprised to hear that I was petrified to get on that stage and sing. Most of these people had never heard me sing before, and I didn’t want to embarrass myself or do something that might make the audience think I’m not as good as I know I can be. (I hope that didn’t sound conceited.)

    I didn’t want to not sing and regret it later, so I put myself on the list to sing “Defying Gravity” from Wicked. I was so scared, and what helped were the supportive audience and especially the people who were on the list before me. They performed with a vibe that screamed, “This is what we’re doing tonight,” and they showed me it was ok to trip over the words here and there.

    When it was my turn, I gave myself permission to act like I had the confidence of a toddler wearing a superhero cape. I let go of my fear and sang my heart out.

    Was it my best performance ever? No.

    Did I get on that stage and own it? Yes.

    Seeing Hamilton on the Big Screen

    I love the musical Hamilton – the music, the choreography, the costumes, even the member of the ensemble who plays the “Bullet.” When the touring show came to Arizona in 2024, I treated myself to a front row seat in the balcony so I could see everything on the stage, unobstructed, including the double rotating turntables.

    2024 was the first time I saw Hamilton, apart from clips I’d seen online. Disney+ had a cinematic version of the show it made available in 2020 during the pandemic, but I never saw it because I don’t have Disney+, or any streaming service for that matter.

    When they announced, for Hamilton’s 10th anniversary, that the Disney+ version of the show was going to be released in movie theaters, I immediately bought my ticket. I purposely went to the first showing, at 11:30am, to avoid the crowd. It was amazing to see the show again, but all the actors now were 20 feet tall. It was amazing to see so many details you can’t see from the audience during the stage show, and I loved seeing the original Broadway cast. I’m still listening to songs from the soundtrack on at least a weekly basis, if not daily.

    Lessons Learned (or Re-learned)

    Chewing gum can help get a song out of your head.

    This is called a “spurtle.” It’s a cooking utensil for stirring things. There’s been one in my kitchen my entire life, and I never knew what it was called. Hat tip to Matteo Lane.

    I’m meant to wear jumpsuits and rompers.

    Best fake number to give out: 248-434-5508

    If you don’t have a club card for a store, input your area code + 867-5309. It usually works.

    My blazer size is 38S slim, but I can’t wear the corresponding slim pants because I have an ass. When you say this to a store clerk, they may laugh uncontrollably.

    If you create a bingo square for your goals, if you don’t have a plan to actually achieve them, you probably won’t.

    When using ChatGPT, at the end of your prompt, add, “Ask me questions, one at a time, until you have the information you need to properly respond to my prompt.” Hat tip to Christopher Penn.

    Sometimes an off-handed comment inspires an act of awesomeness – When I was invited to speak at the Creator Economy Expo (CEX), I jokingly said the speakers’ lounge should be stocked with Mitchell’s ice cream. At CEX, one of the staff members brought me a pint of Mitchell’s vegan chocolate ice cream at the speakers’ party. It’s so good – rich like chocolate mousse.

    This is the gender fluid flag.

    Omnisexual, pansexual, and bisexual are similar but different sexual orientations.

    The trans flag was created in Phoenix, AZ. I learned the street address where this happened. I wish we could have a plaque there, but I’m afraid it would be a target for vandalism.

    If you have an X on your IDs and you select the “non-binary” or “unspecified,” the airline might not let you check in for your flight online.

    Writing “they/them” on your event badge in a color of ink that stands out is more effective at communicating your pronouns than sticking the “they/them” ribbon to the bottom of your badge.

    From running the Mesa Marathon:

    • Before the race, put everything you might need for the first 48 hours after the race at tabletop level, because after the race, bending down may be nearly impossible. 
    • Make yourself eat, even if you’re not hungry, before the race. If you get hungry during the race, that means you’re out of fuel, and your pace will plummet.

    While volunteering at Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary:

    • Turkeys can hiss.
    • Pigeons are not bright.
    • Ducks are really good at hiding their eggs.
    • It’s fun to track the baby animals’ growth by taking photos of them next to my boot for the size comparison.
    Baby Blaze with my Boot – only a few weeks old

    From doing Ironman:

    • Ask for the Ironman race number you want. They just might give it to you.
    • The armband that normally holds your phone when you’re working out is the right size to hold your Gatorade powder refills when you’re racing.
    • Always put a fresh pair of socks, a towel, and baby powder in your T2 bag (the bag that holds your running gear) so you can start the run with dry feet.

    Firsts

    Bought and used the Big A## Calendar so I could see my entire year at the same time.

    Joined Costco.

    Had a colonoscopy – I lost 4 pounds overnight and had doctor-administered good drugs. There’s no downside. If you’re 45 or older, don’t put this off.

    Bought and wore a Speedo-style bathing suit with a drawstring at the waist.

    Participated in a silent disco – everyone wears wireless headphones with three channels of music to choose from, and non-participants can’t hear it – and I danced like no one was watching.

    Broke a porcelain inlay with my teeth and subsequently got my 1st crown.

    Bit through an Invisalign tray, in my sleep, while wearing a night guard. (Yes, I’m that talented.)

    Bought and used a cooling blanket instead of a top sheet all summer. I don’t know how it works, but it works. Met Buddy and Draco Williams, our friends’ basset hounds, who I call Lucy Jane’s cousins.

    Went for a run in an unfamiliar city with Google Maps feeding me directions in my headphones.

    Bought my nibling a Hugimal (weighted stuffed animal) for her birthday, and before I wrapped it, I cuddled it on my lap for over an hour while I scrolled through my social media.

    Events

    Attended CactusCon – it’s like Def Con but less scary.

    Took Lucy Jane to Copa Paws and Claws to hang out in the AZ Basset Hound Rescue booth and show everyone how awesome bassets are.

    Foods

    CocoWhip, a coconut-based vegan Cool Whip-like product. It’s pretty good.

    Nyla, sparkling pickle juice. It’s weird but not bad.

    Sites

    Bisbee, Arizona

    USA-Mexico border and the wall

    Boston Marathon Finish Line

    Newly installed Superman sculpture in Cleveland, OH.

    Public art in Cleveland that says “Things Change” or “Change Things” depending on how you look at it. This really moved me.

    In Memoriam

    Hoomans: Elisa Rae Shupe, George Wendt, Brian Wilson, Giorgio Armani, Cynthia Zimmerman, Kathy Campos, Judge Frank Caprio, Jane Goodall, Diane Keaton, Rob and Michele Reiner, Troy Foster, Barry Halvorson

    Animal Friends: Cinder, Newton, Harvey, Winston, Pepe, Scooter, Emmett, Gretta, Hanna, Tom Tom

  • My 2019 Reading List

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    Ruth Carter

    Included in the scary lofty goals I set for 2019, I have a stack of books I want to read. Everyone has a stack of books on their bedside table, right? I’m excited to dig into these books and spend less time mindlessly watching videos online. Here’s what’s on my reading list, in no particular order.

    Note: These are all affiliate links. If you click on a link and purchase any of these books, you’ll pay the same as everyone else, but I’ll get a small commission.

    My Bedside Book Stack

    Content Inc.: How Entrepreneurs Use Content to Build Massive Audiences and Create Radically Successful Business by Joe Pulizzi
    As the godfather of content marketing, when Joe Pulizzi speaks, I shut up and listen. I’ve had the pleasure of seeing him speak since joining the Content Marketing World family in 2015. I come away from each of his talks with pages of ideas and actionable steps to apply to my content. After devouring Killing Marketing earlier this year, I’m excited to read this book.

     

    Break the Wheel: Question Best Practices, Hone Your Intuition, and Do Your Best Work by Jay Acunzo
    I started following Jay Acunzo’s podcast, Unthinkable, after seeing him speak at Content Marketing World. I spent many mornings running with his interviews with non-traditional entrepreneurs in my ears. He highlights people who found success by ignoring “best practices” and doing what made sense for them. I believe my intuition is never wrong (though sometimes inaccurate), and I look forward to reading about other entrepreneurs who follow their gut instincts.

     

    Body of Work: Finding the Thread That Ties Your Story Together by Pamela Slim
    I consider Pam Slim to be one of my entrepreneurial mentors. I lovingly call her “Aunt Pam.” She has exceptional business instincts and she’s nurturing of others. Many entrepreneurs do a lot of different types of work and this book should help me tell my story effectively and “continually reinvent and relaunch [my] brand.”

     

    The Definition of Success: What Living Homeless Can Teach You by Derek Snook
    I heard about this book at Content Marketing World this year. Derek Snook voluntary became one of the people he was trying to help in order to learn how to best provide for their actual needs, rather than speculate what their needs are as an outsider looking in. Additionally, I’m drawn to the belief that the definition of “success” is personal. As a minimalist, I know my definition of success has nothing to do with the car I drive or what jewelry I wear.

     

    The Storytelling Edge: How to Transform Your Business, Stop Screaming into the Void, and Make People Love You by Joe Lazauskas and Shane Snow
    I was impressed by Joe Lazauskas’ talk on storytelling at the Intelligent Content Conference this year. I hope this book will help me engage and connect with my audience by telling more powerful stories related to my work.

     

    With Lolly the Llama

    Talk Triggers: The Complete Guide to Creating Customers with Word of Mouth by Jay Baer and Daniel Lemin
    I loved Jay Baer’s talk on talk triggers at Content Marketing World this year. These are things that companies do to get people to talk about them – like the chocolate chip cookie you get when you check into the Doubletree Hilton hotel or how everything at Content Marketing World is orange. Jay’s book has llamas on the front and he sent it to me with stuffed llama toy. I’m curious to read the book and learn about the connection.

     

    Side Hustle: From Idea to Income in 27 Days by Chris Guillebeau
    I like Chris Guillebeau because he seems like a quiet guy in person, but beneath that calm exterior, he’s dripping with grit and determination. I started reading this book a few months ago and it lays out what you can do day-by-day to bring an idea to market in under a month. Reading his work helps me not get bogged down in the minutiae of creating a “perfect” product but rather focus on bringing the minimum viable product to market and revise based on actual customer feedback.

     

    Your Brightest Life Journal: A Creative Guide to Becoming Your Best Self by Caroline Kelso Zook
    Earlier this year, I bought Jason and Caroline Zook’s future. I paid a flat fee and every time they come out with a new product or service, I automatically get it. I’ve used Jason’s products in the past, and it made sense to make this investment. This is my first Caroline-create product and I’m excited to see her thoughts. I think I might be like her – someone who was hesitant to get into the product-creation business, but willing to try because she had something of value to offer.

     

    The Inevitable: Understanding the 12 Technological Forces That Will Shape Our Future by Kevin Kelly and Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World by Cal Newport
    I picked up these two books at an invite-only event for lawyers called TBD Law that was only open to forward thinking practitioners. Other attendees spoke well of both books. I’m all for more focused work and success, especially with everything I have on my plate.

     

    DMCA Handbook for Online Service Providers, Websites, and Copyright Owners by Connie Mableson
    Connie Mableson is a lawyer and a colleague who works in my building. She knows the DMCA forwards and backwards, and I’m always looking for resources that will make me a better practitioner and help my client be more effective in protecting their intellectual property.

     

    The E-Myth Attorney: Why Most Legal Practices Don’t Work and What to Do About It by Michael Gerber, Robert Armstrong, and Sanford Fisch
    I read the general E-Myth book early in my experience as an entrepreneur and I was enormously helpful. It helped me think about creating systems and a master document for how my business should be run. I hope this book gives me suggestions about how to be a more effective business owner.

     

    Alight and Alone by Scott Sigler
    These are the second and third books in the Generations Trilogy Series. I’ve already read the first book, Alive. I rarely read fiction because my brain knows it’s not real, so it doesn’t easily remember the storyline. Scott Sigler is one of the few writers who captivates my attention. If you like sci-fi, I highly recommend him. I’ll be reading Alone along with the audio version of the book that he put out via his podcast.

     

    Books I’m Re-visiting in 2019
    Killing Marketing: How Innovative Businesses are Turning Marketing Costs into Profit by Joe Pulizzi and Robert Rose
    I devoured this book in three days while Rosie and I were on vacation this year. The pages are filled with underlined passages and notes in the margins. I came away from it teeming with ideas for creating more blog content. I’ll definitely be going back to review my notes.

     

    Zombie Loyalists: Using Great Service to Create Rabid Fans by Peter Shankman
    I’m interested in doing more research and speaking about integrity. As a lawyer, I know there’s a huge difference between what someone can do and what they should do. So many issues (legal and otherwise) would be prevented if people merely did the right thing. I know this book has many examples of companies doing the right thing by their customers, at least after a substantial misstep.

    What’s on your reading list?

  • Undeniable Recap of 2017

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    Ruth Carter

    2016 was bad. I felt as if that year couldn’t end soon enough.  But it’s as if 2017 started the year saying, “Hold my beer” and it went downhill from there. I had a lot of challenges this year including reconstruction at Castle Carter after my condo flooded, death of my childhood coach, being in a car accident, studying for the California bar exam, and processing my gender identity.

    My jar of happy memories

    Thankfully, I started a new tradition of keeping a jar next to my bed where I wrote notes about things that happened in my life that made me happy or giggle. Even on bad days, I could look over at my jar that was filling with notes and be reminded that life doesn’t suck all the time. It was a joy to go through them while I wrote this post. Here are my top 5 events/activities from 2017:

    Me and my skateboard

    1. I got a Skateboard at CMWorld
    Content Marketing World always does an excellent job taking care of its speakers. I look forward to this conference every year and I’m proud to be part of Team Orange. When they announced that Casey Neistat would be one of the keynote speakers, I started tweeting at them that I wanted an orange skateboard as my speaker gift. (They usually get us each a wireless mouse/laser pointer.) Shortly after I checked into my hotel room, the hotel dropped off a big box for me. It was a mini orange skateboard! I love this thing, not just because it’s awesome, but because it made me feel like part of the CMWorld family. Once I finish my marathon in 2018, I’m going to take a skateboarding lesson and learn how to ride it properly.

    I love this tattoo

    2. “Don’t Be What They Made You” Tattoo
    I saw Logan in the theater. When I heard this line, I instantly knew I wanted it tattooed on my wrist. A few months later, Hollis at Iconic Tattoo made it a reality. This is a daily reminder and inspiration for me.

    3. “But I’m still your Tranpa”
    Accepting that I’m non-binary made me feel like I was a baby queer all over again. I felt especially vulnerable a few months ago and sent an email to trans entertainer and advocate Buck Angel, just an open invitation for lunch the next time he’s in Phoenix. He responded and signed it “Tranpa.” I wrote back and said, age-wise, we’re more like cousins. (We’re only about 7 years apart.) He responded, “Hahaa but I’m still your Tranpa ❤️.”

    This warmed my heart. It matters to talk to people who “get it.” Buck is someone I reach out to when I experience dysmorphia or feel like I live in a world that wasn’t made for me.

    Still smiling after running 20 miles – and rocking some mad hair

    4. Running with David
    I’m training for the Rock ‘n’ Roll Arizona Marathon 2018. After getting a DNF at my last marathon attempt, I decided to hire a coach, David Roher. He lives on the east coast, so we communicate over email, text, and phone. He gives me my assignments and tracks my workouts via Strava, plus we talk about nutrition, stretching, injuries, and life in general.

    David always has a word of encouragement when I need it – often to remind me that I have the ability to do any assignment he gives me and not to push myself too hard. When I finished my 20-mile training run a few weeks ago, I was pleased with my pace and by how good I felt at the end of it.

    5. Ethics and Ice Cream
    I had a flash of brilliance at the beginning of August to do a continuing legal education seminar looking at what Arizona lawyers were being disciplined for during the last few years to look for patterns and commonalities. I pitched the idea to do this for ASU CLE and call it “Ethics and Ice Cream.” They loved it and we scheduled the event for about a month later. I recruited fellow lawyer and comedian, Matt Storrs, and we reviewed all the Lawyer Regulation reports since 2015 and pulled off a successful event.

    This event made this list, not because I created a CLE, but because I put this idea into action and made it work.

    As I read all the notes in my jar, I noticed there were at least six notes that mentioned hugs or being the “little spoon.” Besides giving me a warm fuzzy trip down memory lane, these notes reminded me how important the people in my life are to me.

    Rosie Dog – Go check out her Instagram

    Firsts in 2017
    Flying in/out of a city in one day (for Ungagged Las Vegas)
    Standing ovation for singing “O Holy Night” at the Community Church of Hope Christmas Show
    Love and Complements Rally
    Interview on The Out House Podcast
    Foods: Almond butter (meh), Vegan gourmet shreds (cheese-like, not bad), Cashew milk ice cream (best non-dairy ice cream), Almond milk yogurt (not food), Cashew yogurt (not food), Pumpkin seeds (so good), Spirulina (meh)
    Events: ICON, Law Launcher, TBD Law, BlogHer

    Minions make me smile

    Celebrity Sightings
    Tom Green
    Joseph Gordon Levitt
    Chris Guillebeau
    Casey Neistat
    Paul Risser
    Minions

    In Memoriam
    George Seivert
    Don Rickles
    Andrea Esquer
    Laurel Graver
    Dorian Kreiling