• Undeniable Recap of 2023

    It’s been an eventful, and often exhausting, year. I learned a lot about what’s important to me and what it means to be true to myself – hopefully more to come with those ideas in 2024!

    Here are my top five events from 2023:

    Top Surgery

    When my eyes fluttered open in the recovery room as my anesthesia was wearing off after top surgery, I looked down at my bandaged chest and thought “Yes!” with a smile. The next morning was even better when my surgeon’s physician assistant cut off the bandages and put me in the binder I had to wear during the initial healing. My chest was flat!

    I’ve felt nothing but happiness and joy in my new body – finally feeling like I have the body I’m supposed to have. One of my goals for 2024 is to share the full story of getting top surgery.

    Ropes Course Day

    After top surgery, I knew I wouldn’t be able to extend my arms above my head for six weeks. To enjoy the full use of my body before then, on the Friday before my surgery, I went to Flagstaff to do the Extreme Adventure Course with my friends, Nicole and Ariel. It was so fun to climb the trees and do the five levels of obstacles for about four hours.

    Taking Lucy Jane to the Beach

    Lucy loves being near the water – as long as she doesn’t have to touch it. I took her to Long Beach for a long weekend so she could experience Rosie’s Dog Beach. She had so much fun running and frolicking along the water’s edge.

    Marathon Personal Record: 4:22:59

    I sign up for races because they motivate me to work out. And they’re fun – in a masochistic kind of way. A marathon is a distance I won’t do on my own. I need the support and excitement of race day to run that far.

    And then the Boston Marathon added a non-binary division. Whereas, my goal before was merely to finish, now I want to be fast enough to qualify for this venerated race. I shaved 11 minutes off my previous personal best this year – still a ways to go before I reach my ultimate goal, but I was excited to see so much improvement.

    Seeing My Friends

    I keep a jar on my bedside table, and every time something good happens, I write it down and add it to the jar. As I reviewed my happy memories from 2023, I saw that the majority of them were times spent with friends – often doing nothing exciting, just hanging out, enjoying each other’s company.

    Even though I’m an introvert, and I need my down time, it’s becoming more obvious how much I enjoy and value staying connected to my friends. Whether it’s the friends I see every week when I volunteer at Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary or the people that I see only a few times a year, you are all important to me.

    Lessons Learned (or Re-learned)

    Don’t put your face between the floor and the bed where your excited dog is likely to try to jump onto the bed through your nose

    Don’t let direct sun hit your healing tattoo that’s covered with “second skin.” It feels like you’re cooking your skin/flesh.

    Barely jogging is noticeably faster than walking.

    The “purple spray” antiseptic used to treat the animal’s minor injuries at the farm sanctuary stains your skin purple.

    Don’t ride your bike in running shorts. Always wear bike shorts. That 2mm of padding makes a big difference!

    There is only one correct way to spell “Chanukah.”

    According to my Garmin, I sleepwalk.

    Firsts

    Non-binary Race – Mesa Marathon

    Spending a night in a hospital (not including when I was born)

    Walking outside without a shirt after top surgery

    Washing a cow

    Finding $5 at the bottom of a pool – 13 feet down

    Bone-conducting headphones

    Walking across a state line – VA to DC

    Biking up South Mountain to Dobbins Lookout

    Food Firsts: Dole Whip (yum!), Cinnaholic cinnamon roll (yum!), starfruit (meh), oatmilk soft serve (pretty good)

    First Visits to Sites: Cabazon Dinosaurs (CA), Giant Penny (CA), Continental Divide (NM), Suffragettes statues (TN), Parthenon replica (TN), Lincoln Memorial (DC), Albert Einstein Memorial (DC), Dr. Bob’s House – birthplace of AA (OH), Location of the Boston Tea Party (MA), Edgar Allan Poe statue (MA), World’s Biggest Wooden Gavel (IL), USA’s 2nd Largest Cross (IL), and Giant Cross with creepy life-size Stations of the Cross and homophobic propaganda (TX)

    Giant cross = Open space with grass = Good place to stop on a road trip for Lucy to stretch her legs

    Lucy’s Firsts

    Trip to the beach

    Subway ride

    Doggy backpack

    Doggy pajamas

    Adulting Merit Badges Earned

    Purchased a major appliance (clothes washer)

    Went to State Capitol to testify at a House of Representatives Committee meeting

    Learned how to drive a tractor

    Replaced a knob on my clothes dryer

    In Memoriam

    Hoomans: Burt Bacharach, Richard Belzer, Jim McHugh, Edward Kavanaugh (aka Prince K), Tina Turner, Bruce Press, Alan Arkin, Tony Bennett, Sinead O’Connor, Paul Reubens, Perry Nelson, Suzanne Somers, Richard Moll, Matthew Perry, Jeanne Seivert, Jesús Ociel Baena, Sandra Day O’Connor

    Animal Friends: Ingrid, Gracie, Mochi, Poppi, Jonesy

    Thank you to everyone who made 2023 a good year for me. Looking forward to more adventures and good memories in 2024.

  • Undeniable Recap of 2022

    2022 was a crazy busy year for me. The best moments were the ones I got to share with people I love. Here are some of the highlights:

    I’m an Ironman!

    I will never forget how it felt to run across that black and red carpet and raise my arms as I crossed the finish line while Mike Reilly said, “You are an Ironman!”

    The first 7 months of 2022 were centered around training for Ironman on top of training throughout 2020 and 2021 when my race was cancelled due to COVID. It was a bit surreal to see this dream come to fruition, well until I felt the pain throughout my body.

    In just over 15 hours, I swam 2.4 miles, biked 112 miles, and ran 26.2 miles. Even though I was in top shape for my race, it hurt to do anything once I finished that race.

    I regularly reflect fondly on my Ironman experience. My race day bracelet is still on my wrist, and I’m planning to get my M-dot tattoo in the spring of 2023.

    Crossing the finish line at Ironman Lake Placid: 15:21:42

    Volunteering at Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary

    Starting over a year ago, I spend at least one morning each week volunteering at Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary. For those few hours, I’m nobody’s lawyer. I just get to be a person, and that’s more than enough.

    I love being part of the Farm Family – comprised of its humans and its animals. It’s so sweet when the animals trot up to us for pets, and it’s rewarding to help give them a loving home. And I love working with my fellow volunteers.

    Periodically, I get to invite a friend to volunteer for a day, especially when they seem to need a break from reality, and let them experience the joy that comes with working in this healing place.

    Kissed by Zobe the zebu cow – she is soft as velvet!

    Connecting with Friends at CMWorld

    Content Marketing World (CMWorld) is the best conference I’ve ever attended, and since I’ve been attending and speaking at it since 2015, I’ve become part of the CMWorld family. One of my happy memories from this event says, “Hanging out w/ CMW friends, feeling like I belong.”

    I’m sure I was always seen and loved by my CMWorld family, but I think this year, I didn’t feel that insecurity that usually makes me feel like I don’t measure up to my peers.

    I also let myself have more fun this year. I went on the 6am Running Club runs, accepted dinner invites, and of course, had Boy Band day with JK where we both rocked our orange pants. I was so sleepy silly by the end of the conference, I had to send myself to bed because I was starting to sound drunk even though I was stone cold sober.

    Going to CMWorld also inspired me to get back into writing again – no expectation, just write and see what I’m compelled to create.

    CMWorld Speakers Party!
    Orange Pants!

    Rebranding to Geek Law Firm

    Throughout most of 2022, and I’ll be finishing in 2023, I’m doing a massive rebrand. I rebranded Carter Law Firm to Geek Law Firm, got a new site for The Undeniable Ruth, and I have one more site that’s still being built. This rebrand was something I’d contemplated for a while, and it feels good to get back into writing and with sites that better fit with who I am right now.

    Hat Tip to Dina Miller at Mood for creating my new logo!

    Loving Life with Lucy Jane

    Lucy Jane and I are each other’s emotional support animal. I would not be surprised if I have an Emotional Support Human t-shirt by the end of 2023.

    Lucy Jane is such a sweetheart, giving loves to all her hooman and dog friends. I bring her breakfast and bed each morning, and then she snuggles next to me under the covers as I read my book and drink my coffee. When I get home from a workout, she licks the salt from my sweat off my face and shoulders.

    I took Lucy to the Content Economy Expo (CEX), and the staff made her a special name badge. Networking is super easy with a basset at my feet – all the dog lovers come to me!

    See more of Lucy Jane every Friday on my Instagram.

    Lessons Learned (or Re-learned)

    Do not stand at your desk for 90 minutes when you can’t remember the last time you raised your sit-stand desk.

    My short-term memory sucks.

    Lucy prefers 1:1 puppy playdates over going to the dog park.

    The term “kid gloves” refers to baby goats, not young people.

    Shave your arms before working at the farm, otherwise your stubble will be Velcro for dust.

    The pharmacist at Target will not let you administer a flu shot to yourself.

    When someone enters a religious order, part of the vow of poverty includes signing a legal document where they give up ownership to any intellectual property they might create.

    Even with Trazodone, Lucy is still vocal and wiggly when getting her nails trimmed.

    Don’t walk into a muddy pen at the farm in flip flops.

    Fun day – we assembled my friends’ 12-foot skeleton named Cal Sium.

    Firsts in 2022

    Scanned a QR code

    Baked a yeasted bread from scratch

    Took Lucy to a dog park

    Mounted by a zebu cow

    Struck from a pink-letter arbitration

    Purchased an autograph at Phoenix Fan Fusion

    Bought the photos from a race – IM Lake Placid

    Bitten by a pig

    Volunteered at an Ironman event (70.3 and 140.6)

    Walked 3 dogs at one time

    Got COVID (hopefully the only time I’ll get it)

    Completed the non-binary trifecta – birth certificate, driver’s license, and passport!

    Needle in a Haystack Moment – Meeting a friend of a friend at IMAZ

    Celebrity Sightings

    Dan Pink

    Kate Mulgrew

    Hasan Minhaj

    I was so giddy when Aunt Kate smiled at me.
    Love this guy!

    In Memoriam

    Humans: Gilbert Gottfried, Slique Callahan, Mike Poulton, Nichelle Nichols, Cy Rovie, Olivia Newton-John, Gray Ray, Edgar Marcoux, Louise Fletcher, Angela Lansbury, David Mario, Gordon Stedman, Robbie Coltrane, Isaiah Shepard, Jeannette Black, Leslie Jordan, everyone who died in the 647+ mass shootings in the U.S. in 2022

    Critter Friends: Norman Takaha, Althea Takaha, Chaquita Takaha, Miley Pflughaupt, Sophie Neighbor, Ivy Takaha, Fabio Takaha, Minnie Sellers, Christopher Takaha

    Matching Hooman and Hound Hoodies!
  • Undeniable Recap of 2021

    We didn’t do it gracefully, but we survived 2021. Holy f^¢king sh*t it’s been a roller coaster of a year. Here are some of the highlights.

    Lucy is such a happy dog!

    Lucy Jane Carter

    On April 28, 2021, I got a call from the president of the Arizona Basset Hound Rescue asking if I’d take in a foster. A 3-year-old basset was found wandering by herself in Tempe – no tag or microchip. As I loaded this hound into my car a few hours later I thought, “Here’s to another 10-year commitment.” I named her Lucy Jane.

    Lucy Jane came into my life exactly when I needed her. I’d survived a car accident and sustained a concussion only a few weeks earlier. When I noticed her mellow loving temperament, I registered her as my emotional support dog. We’ve barely been apart since then. She goes to work with me every day, and we even turn my trip to Cleveland for Content Marketing World into a road trip so she could come with me. She’s brought so much love into my life.

    Faith wearing Rosie’s sweater. She was so little!

    Faith Helen Carter

    The reason why I could take in a foster in April, was because Faith, the basset hound I adopted at the end of December 2020, only lived 36 days. For those 36 days, my life was focused on giving this little girl the best life I could. Rescued from a breeder in Tijuana, Faith came with a host of medical issues, including renal failure. On February 1st, after rushing her to the ER for what would be the last time, I accepted that my job was to give this little basset a soft place to land and surround her with love for her final days.

    We did it!

    5K Ocean Swim with the Jews

    Thanks to the pandemic, I’ve been training for my first full Ironman race since the fall of 2019. My race was cancelled in 2020 and 2021. (Hopefully third time’s a charm in 2022.) I still flew to New York to do the 5K ocean swim. My original plan was to do this 3.1-mile swim so that a 2.4-mile swim on race day would be easy in comparison.

    For context, my coach, David Roher, and his friend and my teammate, Shlomo, swim in the ocean at least once a week all summer, and several friends periodically join them, all of whom happen to be Jewish. It was important to me that I could hold my own with this group, not just as part of my training, but also because I didn’t want to be the weakling who couldn’t keep up.

    It turned out, I had nothing to worry about. My training paid off, and I held my own just fine with the “Jewish Swim Team” as I lovingly called them. Coach David swam behind me, just to my left, and I when I periodically drifted out to sea, he grabbed my foot and pulled me back on course. (Swimming in a straight line isn’t my strength.)

    Cow hugging with Moothias – he’s such a sweetheart.

    Volunteering at Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary

    I changed my work schedule at the end of 2021. Now on Monday mornings, when everyone else is heading back to work after the weekend, I head out to Aimee’s Farm Animal Sanctuary. This sanctuary is home to over 100 cows, goats, sheep, chickens, and other animals, many of which have special needs. A lot of the time, my job there involves scooping poop and laying out fresh straw, but it also includes spreading love, petting the animals, and singing to them.

    JK and I decided that we’re in a boy band called Boy Band.

    Hugging my Friends

    As I went through my jar of happy memories while I worked on this Undeniable Recap for this year, I noted that a lot of them were notes about hugging various friends. Between the pandemic and busy lives, I don’t get to see my friends as much as I’d like, so when we do get to meet in person, it’s so wonderful to have that moment where we get to hug.

    We drove out of our way to stand on the corner in Winslow, AZ.

    Firsts in 2021

    Rushing a pet to the ER; Having a pet hospitalized over night

    Cooking with a BBQ

    Using a composting service

    Staying at a Getaway Cabin (I hope they create an outpost in Arizona.)

    Hosting a law graduate for a bar exam

    Getting Experience Points on Sigler in Place

    Getting a concussion as an adult

    Washing my car using a drive through car wash

    Biking at South Mountain on Silent Sunday

    Sights: Standing on the Corner in Winslow, AZ; Singing at Knight Rise in Scottsdale, AZ; Fearless Girl in New York, NY; Captain Janeway Statue in Bloomington, IN; Cadillac Ranch in Amarillo, TX

    We really drove out of our way to visit the Future Birthplace of Captain Janeway.

    Lessons Learned (or Re-learned) in 2021

    I’m a better person when I have a dog.

    Do not perform home surgery on yourself.

    Time is our most precious resource.

    Make time for self-care before you’re forced into it.

    If you answer the phone with, “It’s done. There’s blood everywhere,” the cops may show up at your front door.

    Dairy Queen has pup cups.

    Hooman and Hound – I love this dog.

    In Memoriam

    Hoomans: Ron Flavin, Joanne Rogers, Ethan Pleshe, Jane Murdock, Beverly Cleary, Carolyn Lange, Jason Wright, Michael Berch, Stephen Sondheim, Paul Saviano, James W. Trumpy, and Betty White

    Critter Friends: Jager Martin, NASA Shankman, Athena Takaha, Jasmine Guerrero, Wooliam Takaha, Violet Takaha, Rambo Inman, Pearl Takaha, Bart Isaacson-Ortmeyer, and Bunny Reilly